Monday, October 23, 2006

A Eugoogoly for Homemade Mullet, 10/21/2006-10/23/2006

He was a fine lad, if a bit uneven, and lot ugly. He had his detractors, "What did you do to your hair?!" "I just can't take you seriously with that haircut." "You did that yourself, didn't you." but he also had supporters, "Sweet mullet!" "You should wear that all week." "You cut your hair. I like it. (probably spoken by someone with only a frontal view of the head)" "Nice haircut. (potentially sarcastic)" He was born from the head and the clippers on October 21st at around 4:30 p.m. He was a fun loving, '80's partying kind of haircut. He made his true debut to mixed acclaim and slight controversy later that evening at Ms. Woodbridge's birthday party. He was called brave by his friends but, tragically, ugly by his father. HM was a decent church-going fellow and by his first morning even his father had moments of admiration for him. He wasn't too popular with the jr. high girls, but the same could be said of many an adult heart throb. He had a certain haberdasherly panache that afternoon as he accompanied many friends through a maize-y labyrinth. Twice he slept through the night but his life was tragically cut short Monday morning when the same head and clippers that bore him slaughtered him as he was preparing for work around 8:30 a.m.

RIP Homemade Mullet. You might not have been the really, really, ridiculously good looking; you weren't the prettiest hair in any room, and you won't be missed, but you'll be remembered with joy, laughter, and relief. Good night, sweet coif.

9 comments:

ann said...

I almost cried a little.

I want to see pictures.

Jenn-Jenn, the Mother Hen said...

Yes, we MUST see pics!

Tooz said...

One word:

PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICTURE!!!!!

Becca said...

People. Think about this. Are you absolutely sure you want a picture unless you are properly prepared to use it for blackmail purposes for the next 50 years?

Because unless I can play it like a Get Out of Jail Free Card, I don't think I really wants to see it. Similar to how I felt about the franks and beans in There's Something About Mary--sometimes, imagination is MORE than enough!

Everett said...

I believe it was "frank" singular. "Franks" would be exponentially more disturbing. How'd he get the beans over the frank anyhow?

Everett said...

After I've found 21 other things to take pictures of, and I've remembered to get the film developed, and I've remembered to get a cd version, and I've vetted the picture I'll post one somewhere. There will be no blackmail or getting out of jail free value. There might be some things about me useful for blackmail purposes but I can't imagine any circumstances under which a haircut would be one of them.

Jenn-Jenn, the Mother Hen said...

I don't want to see pics for the blackmail or get out of jail free value (I reserve that right for any pictures I have taken or will take of Jamie for the next 50 years or so). I just want to see the pics for a good chuckle.

Tooz said...

I, on the other hand, want to see them because I miss my sweet boy. Love you.

Becca said...

Dude. You had to ask the question of my nightmares. And really, how should I know? You're much more qualified to answer that question than I'll ever be!